A Day Without Quarreling

A Day Without Quarreling

In a Lao village, two married couples lived not far from one another. The first couple lived in a house beside the road. Almost everyone who passed by heard an argument coming from inside. “Why did you put the basket there?” “Why did you leave the jar here?” “I told you so!” “And I warned you!” Sometimes they could not even remember how the quarrel had begun. One unkind word pulled along another, then a third, and within moments they were both angry as if something terrible had happened. Another couple lived nearby. Troubles came to their home, too. Rice sometimes burned. Rain sometimes soaked a freshly washed cloth. A basket sometimes fell apart just as it was needed for the market. But the neighbors rarely heard arguments from their house. “Never mind, we can mend it,” the husband would say. “Next time, we will try it another way,” his wife would answer. In the village lived a wealthy man who liked to watch people and wonder why some seemed to argue all the time while others managed to keep peace. One day, he said to two helpers, “Take one hundred silver coins to the first couple. Tell them that if they can spend one whole day without an argument, the money will be theirs.” The helpers did as they were told. When the husband and wife heard about the hundred coins, their eyes grew wide. “One full day without quarreling?” said the wife. “That will be easy.” “Easy for me,” said her husband. “As long as you do not start arguing.” The wife frowned. “Me? You are always the one who starts!” “You see? Nothing has even happened, and already you are arguing.” “Because you are blaming me!” “I am not blaming you. I am warning you.” “That is the same thing!” The helpers, who had hidden nearby, looked at one another. Only a few minutes had passed, and their voices could already be heard by the neighbors. At last, the helpers came out of hiding. “We are very sorry,” they said, “but the hundred silver coins will stay with our master today.” Only then did the husband and wife fall silent. They looked at each other. “We quarreled about which of us quarrels more,” said the wife quietly. The husband scratched his head. “It seems we did.” Meanwhile, the wealthy man decided to continue his little experiment. “Now take the same hundred coins to the second couple,” he told his helpers. “But give them the opposite condition. If they argue today, the money will be theirs.” When the second couple heard the condition, the husband thought hard. One hundred silver coins were a great deal of money. They could mend the roof, buy good tools, and still have plenty left. “Well,” he said to his wife, “it seems we must argue today.” “If it is so easy, try,” she said with a smile. The husband began weaving a basket for drying cotton. Usually he worked carefully, but this time he left wide gaps between the bamboo strips. “Now she will surely be annoyed,” he thought. “One puff of wind and all the cotton will blow away.” With great ceremony, he brought the basket to his wife. She turned it over in her hands. “What an unusual one!” she said. The husband waited. “And what do you think of it?” “I think it will be useful for drying. The sun will shine through all these gaps and dry the cotton more quickly.” The husband sighed. His first try had failed. Then he made a second basket. This time, the opening at the top was far too narrow, and he left the edges rough. “Now I am certain,” he thought. His wife took the basket, examined it, and said, “What an interesting thing.” “You like this one, too?” “Of course. When the wind is strong, the cotton will not fly out so easily through the narrow top. And the rough edges may help hold it in place.” The husband almost laughed. “I have spent the whole day trying to make something that would make you angry!” “And I have spent the whole day thinking that if something is already made, there is no need to be angry at once. First we can look for how it might be useful.” They both laughed. The helpers waited nearby until evening. They heard tools tapping, quiet conversation, and laughter, but no true argument. At evening, they went back to their master. “Nothing worked,” they said. “Those two do not seem to know how to quarrel.” The wealthy man smiled. “Then give them the hundred coins.” “But the condition was that they would receive the money only if they argued!” “Yes. But today they showed something more valuable. When people are used to looking for the good in each other, even a reward cannot easily turn them into enemies.” The helpers brought the silver to the second couple. News traveled quickly through the village and reached the first couple. That evening, they sat outside their house in an unusual silence. “Perhaps tomorrow we should try again,” said the wife. “Try what?” “Not quarreling. This time without one hundred coins.” The husband thought, then nodded. “Agreed. And if I say something angry, remind me of the hundred coins we lost in five minutes.” “And if I begin?” “Then I will remind you.” They smiled. People say their home did not become completely silent after that. Like everyone else, they sometimes disagreed. But before either one raised a voice, one of them would ask, “Are we trying to solve the problem, or are we only trying to defeat each other?” Very often, after that, no one felt much like quarreling. So the old story reminds us that peace at home does not mean everyone always thinks the same way. It begins when people remember, even in disagreement, that the person before them is not an opponent, but someone dear.

May this story leave a little light in your heart ✨